1 00:00:01,290 --> 00:00:05,090 Previously on Growing Pains... No, I just told them if they would clean out 2 00:00:05,090 --> 00:00:08,690 house of the unwanted junk, then they could sell that in a garage sale. That 3 00:00:08,690 --> 00:00:11,330 we get a clean house, and they... And they get to keep all the money. 4 00:00:12,090 --> 00:00:13,090 Half? 5 00:00:13,630 --> 00:00:15,030 It was my idea. 6 00:00:16,930 --> 00:00:17,930 Whoa! 7 00:00:18,490 --> 00:00:21,350 What's the beautiful ashtray I made Dad doing out here? 8 00:00:22,350 --> 00:00:23,350 Dad, don't freak! 9 00:00:23,430 --> 00:00:24,910 He loves this ashtray! 10 00:00:25,230 --> 00:00:27,350 He said it was the best present he ever got! 11 00:00:27,810 --> 00:00:28,810 He was lying. 12 00:00:29,230 --> 00:00:30,650 Hey, don't you think ashtrays... 13 00:00:31,150 --> 00:00:31,988 feelings, too. 14 00:00:31,990 --> 00:00:33,870 Well, if they do, then this puppy's in some pain. 15 00:00:34,330 --> 00:00:36,630 It's the best birthday present I've gotten all year. 16 00:00:37,490 --> 00:00:40,990 Ben, put that down. We still have to take out all that junk in the basement. 17 00:00:45,090 --> 00:00:46,190 Sorry, Ackray. 18 00:00:46,390 --> 00:00:47,610 You're sorry, pal. 19 00:00:48,430 --> 00:00:49,590 Hello? Hello? 20 00:00:49,870 --> 00:00:51,450 Our cheap ashtray? Hello? 21 00:00:52,070 --> 00:00:53,150 Ben, come on! 22 00:00:56,590 --> 00:01:00,770 A kid molds me from a simple lump of clay, breathes life into me, and bang, a 23 00:01:00,770 --> 00:01:02,230 couple years later, I'm garbage. 24 00:01:02,770 --> 00:01:03,770 It stinks. 25 00:01:04,230 --> 00:01:05,250 No, that's you. 26 00:01:05,890 --> 00:01:07,670 Let me guess, Carol's glasses? 27 00:01:08,010 --> 00:01:09,250 And you're my sneakers. 28 00:01:09,450 --> 00:01:10,950 I can feel it in the air. 29 00:01:11,330 --> 00:01:12,830 What can I say, Mr. DeWitt? 30 00:01:13,050 --> 00:01:14,510 When you got it, you got it. 31 00:01:16,410 --> 00:01:17,410 Hey, 32 00:01:19,710 --> 00:01:21,710 what are my old glasses doing out here? 33 00:01:22,290 --> 00:01:25,510 Well, you never wear them anymore, so I think... You figured wrong. 34 00:01:26,490 --> 00:01:28,790 Well, then I want to keep my ashtray. 35 00:01:29,170 --> 00:01:31,410 Why? Well, it's still as good as new. 36 00:01:31,970 --> 00:01:33,050 It sure is. 37 00:01:35,470 --> 00:01:37,270 Thank you, Ben. Thank you. 38 00:01:39,610 --> 00:01:41,990 Oh, great, Ben. Now we can't even sell it. 39 00:01:59,259 --> 00:02:02,520 As long as we got each other. 40 00:02:25,580 --> 00:02:27,340 and get it out of its misery? 41 00:02:27,760 --> 00:02:30,700 Mike, this Goofy Glue works miracles, remember? 42 00:02:31,400 --> 00:02:32,400 Ha! 43 00:02:33,720 --> 00:02:34,720 What was that? 44 00:02:34,840 --> 00:02:35,860 You heard it, too? 45 00:02:36,260 --> 00:02:37,900 Would you guys give me a hand? 46 00:02:38,140 --> 00:02:39,140 Yeah. 47 00:02:40,640 --> 00:02:41,640 How you feeling? 48 00:02:42,040 --> 00:02:44,340 Oh, aside from a splitting headache, okay. 49 00:02:44,800 --> 00:02:47,360 You know, just when you think life can't get worse. 50 00:03:04,010 --> 00:03:05,450 for the first day. It's my second. 51 00:04:15,880 --> 00:04:19,399 One titanic burger, all the iceberg lettuce, one considerable fries, two 52 00:04:19,399 --> 00:04:23,780 teas, one whoa, one colossal no ice, one patty meltdown with nuclear dressing. 53 00:04:24,440 --> 00:04:28,060 I knew it. Look at him go. 54 00:04:28,600 --> 00:04:32,400 Nine and ten. Thank you. And as we say at WOG, don't get any on ya. 55 00:04:35,840 --> 00:04:40,340 Oh, what a charming little family here. Welcome to the world of burgers. How may 56 00:04:40,340 --> 00:04:42,000 I help you? Well, we just came to look. 57 00:04:42,520 --> 00:04:46,210 Well, you gotta order something, Dad. Okay, I'll take a meal on it. No, you 58 00:04:46,210 --> 00:04:48,150 don't. No junk food. 59 00:04:56,590 --> 00:05:00,030 We have a nice dinner ready at home. I don't want him loading up on grease. 60 00:05:04,430 --> 00:05:06,830 Double or nothing, he's out of here in ten minutes. 61 00:05:07,670 --> 00:05:11,130 Mike, we've just never had an employee of the month in our family. 62 00:05:15,560 --> 00:05:17,120 I've always been a sucker for a man in uniform. 63 00:05:17,780 --> 00:05:18,780 You have? 64 00:05:20,900 --> 00:05:22,940 Mike, we have a little surprise for you. 65 00:05:23,200 --> 00:05:24,240 Oh, a little surprise. 66 00:05:25,160 --> 00:05:27,740 Anyway, be sure you come straight home after work, okay? Okay. 67 00:05:29,320 --> 00:05:31,700 Hi, I'm the manager. Is there a problem here? 68 00:05:32,040 --> 00:05:35,480 No, none whatsoever. I was down here for breakfast this morning, and this young 69 00:05:35,480 --> 00:05:38,840 man gave me such incredible service. I just wanted to bring the whole family 70 00:05:38,840 --> 00:05:39,840 down to meet him in person. 71 00:05:41,740 --> 00:05:43,580 So, kids, we'd better be going. 72 00:05:44,640 --> 00:05:47,160 But... I want you to remember this day. 73 00:06:20,910 --> 00:06:23,490 That's my fault. You were just getting back from a break and I was handling 74 00:06:23,490 --> 00:06:24,570 registers while she was gone. 75 00:06:25,550 --> 00:06:26,550 Mike? 76 00:06:26,710 --> 00:06:29,330 I don't believe it. You're the employee of the month. 77 00:06:30,250 --> 00:06:33,970 Yeah, look, I'm sorry. I have learned my lesson. My heart is just beating a mile 78 00:06:33,970 --> 00:06:34,970 a minute here. 79 00:06:56,560 --> 00:06:59,320 37. I just don't know what to say. 80 00:06:59,740 --> 00:07:02,160 Look, Scooter, I'm sorry. It will not happen again. 81 00:07:03,120 --> 00:07:04,120 I know. 82 00:07:33,840 --> 00:07:34,719 Yes or no? 83 00:07:34,720 --> 00:07:35,720 Uh, no. 84 00:07:35,900 --> 00:07:36,899 That's right. 85 00:07:36,900 --> 00:07:40,520 Good. At least you know I'm going to find a way to mess things up. What's 86 00:07:40,520 --> 00:07:41,960 problem? You messed up? 87 00:07:43,240 --> 00:07:44,240 No. 88 00:07:44,460 --> 00:07:45,460 Oh. 89 00:07:46,120 --> 00:07:49,120 I mean, I'm not about to go in there and break your little heart, so I can't do 90 00:07:49,120 --> 00:07:50,160 something like that, can I, Ben? 91 00:07:50,500 --> 00:07:51,500 Sure. No. 92 00:07:52,040 --> 00:07:53,220 Uh, that's what I meant. 93 00:07:54,500 --> 00:07:56,680 So now I have to do what I have to do. 94 00:07:59,530 --> 00:08:02,350 Look, Ben, if you want to save yourself a lot of grief, don't let Mom and Dad 95 00:08:02,350 --> 00:08:05,710 expect great things from you. Let them know you're a real disappointment now. 96 00:08:31,310 --> 00:08:32,669 Hello? Hi. 97 00:08:33,390 --> 00:08:35,030 I'm Terry. Is Mike home? 98 00:08:35,450 --> 00:08:38,150 No. Is his burger uniform home? 99 00:08:39,750 --> 00:08:41,190 No, he's wearing it. 100 00:08:41,789 --> 00:08:43,250 Oh, that is so sad. 101 00:08:46,230 --> 00:08:47,730 Terry, I'm a psychiatrist. 102 00:08:49,150 --> 00:08:53,210 Well, I'm the new assistant manager at World of Burgers, and I need his 103 00:08:53,750 --> 00:08:55,050 Oh, well, Mike needs it. 104 00:08:55,250 --> 00:08:56,250 For what? 105 00:08:56,850 --> 00:08:57,850 For work. 106 00:09:05,900 --> 00:09:06,900 Mike was fired? 107 00:09:13,860 --> 00:09:14,860 Hey, Dad. 108 00:09:16,640 --> 00:09:20,220 Well, if it isn't my hard -working son and his well -deserved car. 109 00:09:20,640 --> 00:09:21,840 Yeah, that does, Dad. 110 00:09:22,300 --> 00:09:24,420 You know, I'm really bushy today, Dad. 111 00:09:24,780 --> 00:09:26,520 So how'd it go down to World of Burgers? 112 00:09:26,900 --> 00:09:28,260 Looks like you got some on you. 113 00:09:29,180 --> 00:09:32,820 Yeah, well, let's tell you the truth, Dad. Excuse me? The what? 114 00:09:33,880 --> 00:09:34,900 Just tell you the truth. 115 00:09:36,770 --> 00:09:39,470 Uh, I don't know. I'm getting a little bummed with Wab. 116 00:09:39,990 --> 00:09:42,030 Oh, but you're the employee of the month. 117 00:09:42,790 --> 00:09:46,370 Yeah, but, you know, there's a lot of pressure there, Dad. And, I don't know, 118 00:09:46,430 --> 00:09:48,150 they're talking about making me an assistant manager. 119 00:09:49,030 --> 00:09:51,890 And that'd mean I'd have to go to Berger College and, you know. 120 00:09:52,890 --> 00:09:54,690 I just don't know if I'm university material. 121 00:09:55,930 --> 00:09:58,690 So you're telling me that you're considering quitting this job? 122 00:10:01,870 --> 00:10:03,990 Well, I've already got a better job lined up, Dad. 123 00:10:05,800 --> 00:10:07,000 Yes, in the automotive industry. 124 00:10:08,040 --> 00:10:09,040 Ford? 125 00:10:09,420 --> 00:10:10,760 General... Chrysler. 126 00:10:11,460 --> 00:10:12,460 Bernie. 127 00:10:13,380 --> 00:10:16,760 Bernie? Yeah, Bernie's car wash. I want to be a rag man, Dad. 128 00:10:17,060 --> 00:10:18,500 Tips galore. Great future. 129 00:10:24,520 --> 00:10:26,020 I can't do this. 130 00:10:26,300 --> 00:10:29,480 I can't look you in the face and lie. What is this? All kind of magic power? 131 00:10:32,020 --> 00:10:33,620 Mike, I have to... Dad, I got fired. 132 00:10:35,950 --> 00:10:38,790 It wasn't even my fault, Dad. I mean, I was calling for this girl named Terry 133 00:10:38,790 --> 00:10:40,150 who left her registered drawer open. 134 00:10:40,870 --> 00:10:45,390 I'm sorry. I wanted to tell you, but... Dad, that was the day you gave me this 135 00:10:45,390 --> 00:10:47,450 car. What was I supposed to say then? 136 00:10:47,850 --> 00:10:49,850 Oh, yes. You didn't want to risk losing the car. 137 00:10:50,450 --> 00:10:52,210 No, Dad, it wasn't because of the car. 138 00:10:52,670 --> 00:10:56,330 I mean, it was, but... Not the way you mean. 139 00:10:57,410 --> 00:11:01,130 It was just such a new experience. I mean, how can you be so proud of me? 140 00:11:02,670 --> 00:11:03,670 Confused me. 141 00:11:06,510 --> 00:11:07,510 Well, it confused me, too. 142 00:11:09,070 --> 00:11:13,010 Don't you see, Dad? I mean, I just didn't want you to think I was some 143 00:11:13,010 --> 00:11:14,530 couldn't be trusted with any responsibility. 144 00:11:15,110 --> 00:11:16,750 That's when you started having faith in me. 145 00:11:17,270 --> 00:11:19,190 Well, you've got to have a little faith in me, too. 146 00:11:20,250 --> 00:11:24,610 Oh, come on, Dad. No. If you had somehow found out that I was fired, you'd be 147 00:11:24,610 --> 00:11:27,470 out here pacing, telling Mom how stupid you were to trust me. 148 00:11:31,170 --> 00:11:32,670 Well, possibly we may. 149 00:11:34,370 --> 00:11:35,370 Don't you see? 150 00:11:35,840 --> 00:11:38,000 Do you know how hard it's been for me to keep the truth from you? 151 00:11:39,260 --> 00:11:40,660 So you lied to me for me? 152 00:11:41,680 --> 00:11:43,820 Yeah, I just didn't want to let you down. 153 00:11:44,400 --> 00:11:46,220 No matter what happened to me, it didn't matter. 154 00:11:48,100 --> 00:11:49,440 Well, I appreciate that. 155 00:11:55,280 --> 00:11:56,280 Michael? 156 00:11:56,640 --> 00:12:00,680 We've been waiting for you. Maggie, Mike just told me he lost his job at the 157 00:12:00,680 --> 00:12:02,040 burger place last week. 158 00:12:02,360 --> 00:12:03,360 Oh, he did? 159 00:12:03,600 --> 00:12:04,640 I was shocked. 160 00:12:07,339 --> 00:12:08,339 You were? 161 00:12:08,960 --> 00:12:11,360 Jason, he's been lying to us for an entire week. 162 00:12:11,800 --> 00:12:12,800 Yes. 163 00:12:14,280 --> 00:12:15,880 Is that a great kid or what? 164 00:12:20,680 --> 00:12:22,800 Since that time, I've been sitting on a hook. 165 00:12:23,100 --> 00:12:26,720 Now you want to talk pain, Ashtray? Try sitting two years on a hook. 166 00:12:27,400 --> 00:12:29,820 I just want to go back on Jason's desk. 167 00:12:32,220 --> 00:12:34,120 Oh, swear not by the moon. 168 00:12:34,460 --> 00:12:38,100 The inconstant moon that monthly changes in her circled orb. 169 00:12:38,320 --> 00:12:39,440 This is what I need? 170 00:12:39,740 --> 00:12:44,100 It is a tale told by an idiot full of sound and fury and signifying nothing. 171 00:12:44,360 --> 00:12:47,520 No offense, Ashtray. Why does everybody pick on me? 172 00:12:47,840 --> 00:12:50,580 Because you have not lived or loved. 173 00:12:51,860 --> 00:12:58,320 Oh, swear not by the moon. The inconstant moon that monthly changes in 174 00:12:58,320 --> 00:12:59,340 circled orb. 175 00:12:59,900 --> 00:13:03,040 Let that thy love prove likewise variable. 176 00:13:03,930 --> 00:13:05,310 What shall I swear by? 177 00:13:09,350 --> 00:13:13,650 Hey, we're trying to do a little Romeo and Juliet here. We don't need no 178 00:13:13,650 --> 00:13:15,370 insensitive jerk messing it up. 179 00:13:15,930 --> 00:13:16,930 Sorry, coach. 180 00:13:16,950 --> 00:13:17,950 All right. 181 00:13:18,370 --> 00:13:20,990 Go back to the part where Romeo was swearing. 182 00:13:24,890 --> 00:13:25,890 Okay, people. 183 00:13:26,590 --> 00:13:30,430 Remember, next week we have a major exam on all the Shakespeare sonnets, so you 184 00:13:30,430 --> 00:13:32,050 better know your abstinence from your elbows. 185 00:13:39,120 --> 00:13:41,280 There are sensitive men like Romeo nowadays. 186 00:13:41,860 --> 00:13:43,960 Men who aren't afraid to cry. 187 00:13:44,340 --> 00:13:47,580 I mean, all we have are insensitive jocks. 188 00:13:48,080 --> 00:13:50,280 Do you think Tom Cruise cries? 189 00:13:50,640 --> 00:13:53,720 Tom Cruise can do anything he wants. 190 00:13:57,740 --> 00:13:58,740 Fever. 191 00:13:59,500 --> 00:14:00,780 Yes, Mr. Lovett? 192 00:14:01,320 --> 00:14:04,680 Fever, I'm going to say something to you that may shock you. 193 00:14:04,980 --> 00:14:07,260 But in this class, I consider you my equal. 194 00:14:10,000 --> 00:14:14,120 Well, what I mean is, is that if I had a question about Shakespeare, and I had a 195 00:14:14,120 --> 00:14:16,840 choice of either asking him or you, I'd ask you. 196 00:14:17,960 --> 00:14:18,960 Well, thank you. 197 00:14:19,120 --> 00:14:22,020 And it has nothing to do with the fact that he ran around in tights all the 198 00:14:22,020 --> 00:14:23,020 time. 199 00:14:23,480 --> 00:14:25,300 The point is, is that I need your help. 200 00:14:25,960 --> 00:14:29,220 It's no big secret that I wouldn't even be teaching this class if Mrs. 201 00:14:29,440 --> 00:14:31,580 Orbeau hadn't gone a little bit flaky, if you know what I mean. 202 00:14:33,000 --> 00:14:37,240 But there's a kid who's flunking the class who shouldn't be, and I kind of 203 00:14:37,240 --> 00:14:38,240 myself. 204 00:14:38,830 --> 00:14:42,090 So I was wondering if maybe you could tutor him. 205 00:14:43,550 --> 00:14:47,290 Well, I've never really thought of myself as a teacher. 206 00:14:47,570 --> 00:14:48,570 Hey, who has? 207 00:14:49,590 --> 00:14:50,590 So what do you say? 208 00:14:50,670 --> 00:14:52,790 Okay, I'll give it a shot. Ah, yeah. 209 00:14:54,310 --> 00:14:55,310 Hey, Bobby. 210 00:14:55,670 --> 00:14:56,670 The chalk? 211 00:14:56,850 --> 00:14:57,850 Yeah, 212 00:14:59,330 --> 00:15:02,350 Bobby, uh, Seaver here is gonna help you through, uh, that Shakespeare stuff. 213 00:15:02,650 --> 00:15:03,389 All right. 214 00:15:03,390 --> 00:15:04,390 Now, look. 215 00:15:04,870 --> 00:15:08,820 You do everything she says, because if you don't pass... You don't play. 216 00:15:09,040 --> 00:15:12,700 It ain't going to do you no good to come crying your eyes out to me like you did 217 00:15:12,700 --> 00:15:13,700 last year. 218 00:15:16,120 --> 00:15:21,440 I don't think we ever really met. I'm Bobby Wynette. 219 00:15:21,680 --> 00:15:22,680 I know. 220 00:15:22,880 --> 00:15:24,420 And you're Carol the Brain. 221 00:15:24,620 --> 00:15:25,620 I know. 222 00:15:28,440 --> 00:15:31,440 You actually cried last year? 223 00:15:31,980 --> 00:15:32,980 Yeah. 224 00:15:34,080 --> 00:15:35,080 Groin pull. 225 00:15:36,330 --> 00:15:39,630 Why Romeo didn't try CPR on Juliet before he killed himself. 226 00:15:41,110 --> 00:15:44,370 I mean, the guy doesn't even check a pulse before he does himself in. 227 00:15:44,890 --> 00:15:48,950 Father, the play is over 400 years old. 228 00:15:49,310 --> 00:15:50,310 It's a classic. 229 00:15:50,650 --> 00:15:54,730 Look, to you geniuses, it may make sense that Juliet gets some drug from a 230 00:15:54,730 --> 00:15:57,730 priest to pretend like she's dead so she can run off with a guy who's too stupid 231 00:15:57,730 --> 00:15:59,050 to pick up the phone and call a doctor. 232 00:16:00,110 --> 00:16:02,230 But to a guy like me, it's sheep dip. 233 00:16:04,090 --> 00:16:05,310 You're calling Shakespeare. 234 00:16:08,279 --> 00:16:12,820 If I was Romeo and you were Juliet and I really had it bad for you, there's 235 00:16:12,820 --> 00:16:16,540 nothing nobody would say to get in the way. Not my family, not your family, not 236 00:16:16,540 --> 00:16:19,560 nobody. By the time those people turned around and looked for you and me, we'd 237 00:16:19,560 --> 00:16:20,940 be in my pickup halfway to Jersey. 238 00:16:25,400 --> 00:16:26,740 Sorry I lost my temper. 239 00:16:28,300 --> 00:16:30,280 Sometimes my emotions get the best of me. 240 00:16:31,440 --> 00:16:32,560 Guess I'm too sensitive. 241 00:16:35,880 --> 00:16:39,260 It's okay. I really didn't want any more anyway. 242 00:16:41,420 --> 00:16:44,000 This tutoring stuff's a bad idea. My head's too thick. 243 00:16:44,200 --> 00:16:45,200 No, no, no, no, no. 244 00:16:45,700 --> 00:16:49,580 Understanding Shakespeare is a very difficult thing to do. You know, when I 245 00:16:49,580 --> 00:16:51,600 first read his plays, I was lost for months. 246 00:16:52,060 --> 00:16:53,840 I ruined my entire sixth grade year. 247 00:16:54,360 --> 00:16:56,420 You read this stuff in the sixth grade? 248 00:16:58,420 --> 00:16:59,420 So weird, okay? 249 00:17:00,120 --> 00:17:01,300 No, no, no, you're smart. 250 00:17:08,040 --> 00:17:11,700 Boy, spending this much time with me must really be boring for you, huh? 251 00:17:13,280 --> 00:17:14,280 Not really. 252 00:17:18,960 --> 00:17:20,780 So where were we? Everybody was dead. 253 00:17:23,880 --> 00:17:26,579 So, like, what is this Bobby Winnett situation? 254 00:17:27,780 --> 00:17:30,140 There's no situation. I'm just tutoring him. 255 00:17:30,560 --> 00:17:32,320 Oh, well, that figures. 256 00:17:34,480 --> 00:17:36,340 And what is that supposed to mean? 257 00:17:37,180 --> 00:17:38,240 Well, I don't know. 258 00:17:38,760 --> 00:17:40,600 Oh, come on, Carol, don't have a cow. 259 00:17:40,920 --> 00:17:45,300 Everybody knows you're... immaculate. 260 00:17:48,640 --> 00:17:51,040 Immaculate? You know, wholesome. 261 00:17:51,520 --> 00:17:55,480 Well, there are more things to be, like, um, fat. 262 00:17:58,480 --> 00:18:04,740 Well, for your information, Bob... me and i did our studying all evening in my 263 00:18:04,740 --> 00:18:10,760 bedroom and the subject was um romeo and juliet if you get my meaning 264 00:18:10,760 --> 00:18:15,060 you know maybe i don't have to ogle the boys swim team and act like a little 265 00:18:15,060 --> 00:18:22,000 girl when i can be a woman at home you look like you've 266 00:18:22,000 --> 00:18:26,220 been in a fight oh yeah but who with and my six period speech class What, you 267 00:18:26,220 --> 00:18:27,220 fought the whole class? 268 00:18:27,420 --> 00:18:30,180 Look, I'm not dead. I was on the bottom of the pile. Now, my fight is not 269 00:18:30,180 --> 00:18:31,079 important right now. 270 00:18:31,080 --> 00:18:32,080 Either is my suspension. 271 00:18:34,800 --> 00:18:35,800 You were suspended? 272 00:18:36,640 --> 00:18:40,380 Yeah. All right. Now, at the start of the class, Eddie comes up to me and asks 273 00:18:40,380 --> 00:18:43,520 me if I heard the news. I say, what news? He says, about Carol. 274 00:18:43,860 --> 00:18:47,000 Well, you know me. I mean, I'm always ready for a good Carol nerd story. 275 00:18:48,060 --> 00:18:50,520 Then he starts saying this disgusting stuff about Carol. 276 00:18:51,020 --> 00:18:53,160 So I keep smiling, see, waiting for the punchline. 277 00:18:53,420 --> 00:18:54,420 And he's not kidding. 278 00:18:54,920 --> 00:18:56,840 I don't know what happened. But the next thing I know, I'm sitting there 279 00:18:56,840 --> 00:18:57,840 punching Eddie out. 280 00:18:57,880 --> 00:18:59,480 And then I'm sitting there swinging and kicking. 281 00:18:59,680 --> 00:19:01,460 And I couldn't even figure out why I was so angry. 282 00:19:02,460 --> 00:19:05,000 I mean, here I was getting all busted up protecting Carol. 283 00:19:06,440 --> 00:19:11,420 How could you start a rumor like that about... It is a rumor, isn't it? 284 00:19:12,520 --> 00:19:18,940 Of course it is, Mom. I mean, everybody knows that decent, responsible, 285 00:19:19,500 --> 00:19:23,000 immaculate Carol wouldn't dare do a thing like that. 286 00:19:23,820 --> 00:19:24,820 Then why? 287 00:19:29,420 --> 00:19:32,160 Carol, that's a Mike answer. I expect a little more from you. 288 00:19:34,100 --> 00:19:35,500 What am I, a saint? 289 00:19:35,880 --> 00:19:40,020 Why do you always have to say, Mike, why can't you be more like your sister? Why 290 00:19:40,020 --> 00:19:43,540 does every teacher I've ever had put me in charge when they leave the classroom? 291 00:19:44,760 --> 00:19:48,540 Why is it that I'm the one always to be elected a recording secretary? 292 00:19:51,600 --> 00:19:53,920 Oh, honey, those are all good things. 293 00:19:56,160 --> 00:19:57,680 I just wish... 294 00:19:58,860 --> 00:20:05,060 That every once in a while it would be nice to be thought of as dangerous. 295 00:20:09,540 --> 00:20:10,540 Provocative? 296 00:20:11,920 --> 00:20:12,920 Yes. 297 00:20:15,520 --> 00:20:16,520 Sexy? 298 00:20:16,940 --> 00:20:17,940 Yes. 299 00:20:19,020 --> 00:20:23,220 The kind of girl that should never be allowed to study in her bedroom with a 300 00:20:23,220 --> 00:20:24,220 hunk? 301 00:20:24,260 --> 00:20:25,260 Yes. 302 00:20:28,590 --> 00:20:32,150 How does Bobby's, um, cute bottom? 303 00:20:33,070 --> 00:20:35,570 Well, am I wrong? 304 00:20:38,290 --> 00:20:44,670 You know, honey, you're going to have to clear up this rumor at school. 305 00:20:46,210 --> 00:20:47,210 Oh, yeah. 306 00:20:49,470 --> 00:20:53,250 Do you think it could, um, wait a couple days? 307 00:20:55,560 --> 00:20:58,760 players who strut and fret till our final curtain draws nigh. 308 00:20:59,340 --> 00:21:01,400 Let's just all face it, we're garbage. 309 00:21:02,100 --> 00:21:03,200 I'm not garbage. 310 00:21:03,580 --> 00:21:04,880 No, you're ugly garbage. 311 00:21:07,260 --> 00:21:09,440 Oh, my copy of Romeo and Juliet. 312 00:21:09,980 --> 00:21:12,500 Yeah, we're not going to get very much for it because you actually read it. 313 00:21:13,520 --> 00:21:15,940 The book brought Bobby and me together. 314 00:21:16,460 --> 00:21:18,300 Yeah, that book's doing a lot better than Bobby did. 315 00:21:19,620 --> 00:21:21,880 Mike, this is a memento of my past. 316 00:21:23,080 --> 00:21:26,120 But then how... How can I expect you to understand sentiment? 317 00:21:26,440 --> 00:21:28,400 Hey, look, sentiment is for wimps. 318 00:21:29,280 --> 00:21:30,820 Hey, my burger hat. 319 00:21:31,440 --> 00:21:33,020 What are you guys, out of your minds? 320 00:21:35,160 --> 00:21:37,620 Hey, you know, a lot of this stuff is still in pretty good shape. 321 00:21:38,000 --> 00:21:40,240 Mike, at this rate, we won't have anything left to sell. 322 00:21:40,820 --> 00:21:41,820 Well, so? 323 00:21:42,220 --> 00:21:43,940 Good, because I like my old junk. 324 00:21:44,380 --> 00:21:47,680 I don't think you two seem to grasp the concept of a garage sale. 325 00:21:48,600 --> 00:21:51,260 My prawn dress does not leave this house. 326 00:21:51,820 --> 00:21:52,820 You know what I think? 327 00:21:53,200 --> 00:21:56,520 Dad telling us about all the money we're going to make in this garage sale, it's 328 00:21:56,520 --> 00:21:59,220 just his way of tricking us into cleaning up the house. 329 00:21:59,580 --> 00:22:01,860 Next time, we ask for the money up front. 330 00:22:03,580 --> 00:22:07,180 Hey, just because they're garbage pail kids doesn't mean they're garbage. 331 00:22:08,460 --> 00:22:11,480 Ben, what's with Mike and Carol? They said the garage sale's off. 332 00:22:11,780 --> 00:22:13,460 Yeah, we don't want to sell anything. 333 00:22:13,920 --> 00:22:14,819 Why? 334 00:22:14,820 --> 00:22:17,960 Well, Dad, this stuff is bringing back memories of my youth. 335 00:22:18,920 --> 00:22:22,200 Well, losing some things doesn't mean losing your memories. 336 00:22:23,100 --> 00:22:24,120 I want to keep my old junk. 337 00:22:24,320 --> 00:22:27,740 You don't want to get too attached to some old piece of useless junk that you 338 00:22:27,740 --> 00:22:29,300 don't need. You guys are too old for that. 339 00:22:41,180 --> 00:22:43,620 Ben, what's this ashtray you gave me doing out here? 340 00:22:43,900 --> 00:22:47,500 Well, I didn't want to sell it, and it was in a box, and I figured you didn't 341 00:22:47,500 --> 00:22:48,500 want it anymore. 342 00:22:49,260 --> 00:22:52,260 Why? Just because I don't smoke or ever use it? 343 00:22:52,620 --> 00:22:56,640 Yeah. Well, that doesn't mean I don't need it. Don't you see? 344 00:22:57,260 --> 00:22:58,260 No. 345 00:22:58,560 --> 00:22:59,900 Maybe when you're older. 346 00:23:00,420 --> 00:23:03,720 But this thing is going right back on my office desk right now. 347 00:23:06,520 --> 00:23:07,520 Thanks, Dad. 348 00:23:12,140 --> 00:23:13,140 That was close. 349 00:23:13,520 --> 00:23:14,680 You're telling me. 350 00:23:21,090 --> 00:23:23,390 rosemary, and dill weed. 351 00:23:23,890 --> 00:23:29,210 Of course, the sage, rosemary, and... Oh, I'm better, huh, guys? 352 00:23:30,030 --> 00:23:31,030 You're welcome. 353 00:23:33,010 --> 00:23:37,250 Oh, Jason, he wants to come crazy talking to a spice rack. 354 00:23:38,650 --> 00:23:39,650 No.